Let Brotherly Love Continue
Hebrews 13:1
Introduction.
In several polls conducted on what people look for in a church, one thing that consistently came up was friendliness.
This is friendliness of the congregation and of the leadership.
One thing I’ve noticed about this congregation is that we are a friendly bunch, particularly to our visitors.
That is not the same everywhere, and I’d like to encourage us to keep it up with today’s lesson on brotherly kindness.
Our goal this morning is to make our call and election sure (2 Pet. 1:10).
We have discussed faith, virtue, knowledge, self-control, perseverance, and godliness.
Today we will add one more characteristic to help us in our goal: brotherly kindness.
Practicing brotherly kindness will help us to be more friendly and more attractive to those looking for a church.
This can’t be a one-time thing, but a continual thing.
People can often tell with a visit or two if we share brotherly kindness with one another or not—there is an atmosphere we create.
So let’s show brotherly kindness, not just for our own sakes, but for the sake of the gospel.
This is distinguished from the ἀγάπη love which we will discuss next week.
Preview: What? Who? How? Why?
Body.
What is this brotherly kindness?
Define brotherly kindness.
One Greek word – φιλαδελφία.
Might recognize that as Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love (Rev. 3:7).
In Greek, there are several words that we often translate as “love” – perhaps the translators didn’t want to double up here, and decided to call it brotherly kindness.
One word is φιλέω – to love, to treat affectionately or kindly, to welcome, to befriend.
It is often associated with friendliness, and a form of it is even the word for friend.
This is the word that is combined with another that is our subject for today.
The other is ἀδελφός – a brother or sibling.
So φιλαδελφία is to love as a brother, be affectionate, kind, friendly, and welcoming.
It is translated as “brotherly love,” “brotherly kindness,” and “love of the brethren.”
It is more personal than the ἀγάπη love we often talk about.
Children illustration.
There are many times that Victoria and I have to tell Caroline to be nice toward Seth.
But in the very next moment, she’s so affectionate toward him.
We must teach our kids self-control, but also show examples of kindness, affection, and love.
Kids will copy what they see.
Between my brother and me, we had our fights, but we loved each other… still do.
When we were young, we saw strife between our father and his brothers and swore to each other we would never let that happen between us.
We were intentional with our love for each other, just as we need to be with our fellow Christians.
Who should we show this kindness to?
We should show this to all our fellow Christians, particularly those with whom we worship.
There’s a song we sometimes sing: “Take Time to Be Holy.”
One line in that song says, “Make friends of God’s children.”
That’s the idea that brotherly kindness engenders.
Be friendly and make friends with one another (Prov. 18:24).
The problem is that churches are made of many different personalities.
Some people you will get along with very well.
These people are easy to show brotherly love to.
It’s the people that you don’t get along with that’s the problem.
How would you handle such people outside the church?
You would probably avoid them as much as possible.
But is that how we need to treat our fellow Christians?
Some take more of an effort to be friendly to, so how?
How do we show this kindness?
For some it comes naturally.
There are some whose foibles you don’t mind and who don’t mind yours.
And those are the people that are easiest to get along with—but if it’s easy, what reward is there? (Matt. 5:46).
It was one of the first things taught, as Paul tells the Thessalonians (1 Thess. 4:9-10).
While Paul didn’t have to write to them about it, he did, and that they should do it more.
It is not so easy for everyone.
As noted in Prov. 18:24, be friendly.
This could mean all manner of things, but what it means for me is not to be stingy with my smiles, laughter, handshakes, or hugs when appropriate.
Be quick to hear, but slow to speak.
We usually get into trouble with our mouths, so do keep in mind James 1:19.
This verse has been with me ever since I heard it, and it’s taken me so many years to put it into practice.
James himself talks about how difficult it is to tame the tongue later on.
Am I perfect at that? Oh no, but I think I’m a little better than I was last year and the year before that.
Being slow to wrath is a big part of that, too.
This requires patience—not the perseverance we talked about a couple weeks ago, but the longsuffering that’s required in dealing with people.
While we should let [our] speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt (Col. 4:6), let us also be gracious when we listen to others.
We don’t always know what they’ve been through, and while it doesn’t excuse bad behavior, it might explain it so you can handle it better.
Often the more you get to know someone, the more you can tolerate their foibles.
Ultimately, you can’t control them, only how you react to them.
In one situation, I decided I simply would not argue anymore, and instantly things improved.
I know it’s not always this easy, but sometimes it is—be resolved not to be offended.
We are all a work in progress, after all.
Give preference to one another (Rom. 12:10).
To be kindly affectionate, this is the love between parents and children.
It is so strong, it combines two words for love: φίλος and στοργή.
Στοργὴ is the love you would have for family (children, parents, spouse).
Paul amplifies it by adding another word for love, the love of friends.
Don’t be inappropriate with your love, but be friendly with brotherly love.
We do this, in part, by giving preference to one another.
Put their desires over yours, not being selfish and thinking only of yourself.
Show them the utmost respect, whether deserved or not, whether reciprocated or not.
Why should we be kind to one another?
Kindness (or a lack thereof) is palpable.
People will be able to detect it when they visit.
We don’t want to drive anyway away because we are lacking in brotherly love.
I don’t think it’s a problem here, but keep it up and get better.
Just as Paul urged the Thessalonians, to increase more and more.
We are to be little Christs (def. of Christian).
We are to show the light of Christ wherever we go.
That includes in our interactions with our fellow Christians.
We are to be Christ to each other, for each other, helping each other as Christ would.
We have purified our souls and obeyed the truth for this (1 Pet. 1:22).
As one brother put it, we are “saved for some holy purpose,” and here “the love of the brethren is identified as that holy purpose” (Coffman).
It is sincere, but more literally it’s not hypocritical (KJV: unfeigned).
It isn’t fake, it is genuine—so our love for each other must be real.
But one reason for our kindness is because that’s our purpose as Christians, having been born again by the incorruptible word of God (1:32).
Finally, it’s one more step to making our call and election sure.
Conclusion.
Brotherly love and kindness is so vital if a church is expected to thrive.
Without it, people aren’t going to want to be here.
Some may still come out of a sense of duty and obligation.
But we won’t grow, and many will be lost through attrition.
Again, not a problem here, but let us increase more and more.
Let brotherly love continue (Heb. 13:1).
We might not all be the best of friends, but we can be friendly to one another.
Let it be genuine friendliness and not hypocritical.
Personalities or circumstances might not bring us close, but we should work at being welcoming, kind, and friendly to every brother/sister in Christ.
Of course, exercise wisdom—you can be overly friendly.
Keep in mind everyone has foibles and their own problems they are working on.
Let us “make friends of God’s children.”
Before we can have that purpose of having sincere love of the brethren, we must first purify ourselves by obeying the truth.
This indicates that there is something we must do to be saved!
Looking at the examples in Acts of those who obeyed the truth, they all believed and were baptized.
We can tell from other passages, they were to repent and confess Christ, too.
Will you obey that truth this morning?